maybe people shouldn't read my blog...alwasy complaining

Today was a bad day. I have never felt so alone in all my life. Even with all the venting, today I really realized how alone I feel. I LOVE my husband and he is ALWAYS there for me but sometimes you just really need girl time, a girl's perspective, or just something different than the husband kind of love. I made friends at CSUN and thought these friendships would last but as soon as I moved, I started losing these friends. I thank the Lord for for the four that stuck by me. BUT they all live at least a half hour away and even more with traffic. Then at Long Beach, I made two good friends but those two friends are best friends so I'm totally the third wheel. They just took a trip together with their husbands to Vegas. I want that. I've always wanted to travel with friends but life happened. Then these two girls have gotten every class and clinic together AND are ahead of me now because they got two clinics this semeseter so now I'm graduating alone. I never thought that would happen to me. I know this might not seem like a big deal to most but I will have no friends there to celebrate with me. I mean, I have acquaintances but it's not the same thing. And again because of life I only get to see my best friend once a month which just blows. Struggling for four years to make friends really scares me for the future. I want friends but am I ever gonna have friends down here. The one friend i had that I saw on a regular basis basically ditched me. I never hear from her anymore and all she has is bogus excuses. Then we have the autographing friends but they're all guys. Oh, and we went to this screening party of Dexter season finale and it was SO fun to be with all these people into the same thing. we used to do this for Lost and I forgot how much I loved doing that. I wanted to get a movie night started but again the distance between everyone doesn't help. I finally have a girls weekend planned with three girls from CSUN. Just hope they don't flake. I just want one female friend that is close by and i can depend on and go over for coffee just to talk. Not asking for much. I just don't want to feel so alone anymore.